You are happily married. Slowly but steadily, your marriage begins to get worse. You don’t seem to worry, though. After 10-20 years of marriage, you think it is natural for some things to change. You don’t flirt as you used to. You have kids. Your sex life is not as it used to be – if there is any, but you are a family, you do everything together and you seem to be doing pretty much ok. Then, out of nowhere, bombs away!
I want a divorce
What went wrong?
I have trained dozens of men who have faced this problem. Their marriage is about to die. Divorce is on its way. Men who have been in a relationship. Men who have been trapped in a marriage and have lost their masculinity on the way. They lose their touch with flirting, they lose their power as men, they lose their desire to be men, take risks, lead the way in the relationship.
What is going on in a woman’s mind?
At first, when a man gets serious and stops flirting around, his girlfriend is happy. She feels more secure and their bond gets stronger. You need to be able to trust your companion. Though, attraction dicreases. She starts complaining that there is no flirting between them. She starts feeling emotionally empty. Her man stops being so converned about his appearance, perhaps. His style, his clothing, his body.. her husband might start to feel that his flirting days are over so he does not have to be careful about all this stuff. Inavetably, sex gets worse as well. Less often, less passion.
In order for your wife to be loyal and dedicated to your wedding, she needs to feel complete in three different ways:
- emotionally. She needs to feel that you complete her in this part. That you understand her feelings and you keep attraction level high.
- Sexually. No need to analyze this more. Sex is necessary for both men and women.
- Spiritually. This is about communication, common interests, getting along with each other.
So what happens during the marriage, is that the couple gets more spiritual connection, but usually gets worse emotionally and sexually.
Where does the problem come from?
This is not fair: We are responsible for our marriage decay. It is a man’s responsibility to keep sexual and emotional spark in the relationship.
Being married puts you “out of the Game”. You think it is “bad” to flirt with strangers. You have a family now. You are happily married. You need to protect your family and be loyal to your wife. You stop flirting and lose faith in your ability to attract beautiful women. Next step: you stop flirting with your wife as well.
As months go by and you are loyal to your woman, the level of testosterone begins to decline. This is a nature’s defense mechanism, to keep you away from “hunting”. Your insticts are sidelined. Your sexual desire fades away, as your will to flirt as well. It is so hard to find balance between being a good husband and not losing your masculinity. You need to take drastic measures. Sometimes, it might already be too late.
Divorce is final. You are single, once again. 10-15 years might have passed. All your friends are married or in a relationship. Your social circle is not helping you at all to get back in the game. You feel trapped and alone.
You seme to have lost yourself. You’ve forgotten what flirt is all about. You’ve forgotten how amazing it can be to be able to seduce beautiful women. How refreshing it can be. It’s time you remembered everything again. It’s time for you to experience the most intense nights of your life. Things are not over at 40 or 50. Life only ends when you decide to give up.